A daughter is feeling deeply betrayed by her 69-year-old mother’s decision to purchase a beach house, a vacation home, instead of assisting her with mounting debt and providing a car for her daughter. The daughter expresses frustration, highlighting her own financial struggles and the perception that her mother prioritizes personal enjoyment over familial support. She feels that her mother, who claims to be on a budget when asked for help, has demonstrated a willingness to spend lavishly on herself, leading to feelings of resentment and abandonment.

The daughter emphasizes her own hard work and sacrifices, contrasting them with her mother’s ability to indulge in a beach house retreat. She questions her mother’s empathy, suggesting that her mother’s actions demonstrate a lack of care for her family’s well-being. The daughter feels that her years of support for her mother should warrant reciprocal assistance, and that her mother is choosing to ignore her family’s needs in favor of her own desires.

Conversely, the mother defends her decision, explaining that the beach house represents a lifelong dream shared with her late husband. After his passing, she felt compelled to fulfill their dream and prioritize her own happiness, having spent a lifetime putting others first. She clarifies that her retirement savings are not an emergency fund for her daughter and that she doesn’t believe she owes her granddaughter a car, asserting that her daughter needs to become financially independent.

The mother acknowledges her daughter’s struggles but maintains that she has provided ample support over the years. She views the beach house as a symbol of finally choosing to live, not an act of selfishness. She argues that her decision is about fulfilling a personal promise and enjoying her retirement, rather than neglecting her family.

The conflict highlights a clash between generational perspectives on financial responsibility and the pursuit of personal fulfillment. The daughter feels entitled to her mother’s financial assistance, while the mother believes she has earned the right to prioritize her own happiness after a lifetime of sacrifice. The situation raises questions about the boundaries of parental financial support and the balance between familial obligation and personal desires.